{"id":7090,"date":"2022-02-11T12:54:52","date_gmt":"2022-02-11T11:54:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mediatrio.se\/?p=7090"},"modified":"2024-06-18T23:32:43","modified_gmt":"2024-06-18T21:32:43","slug":"lottens-betraktelser","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kunder.bulta.se\/mediatrio24\/lottens-betraktelser\/","title":{"rendered":"Lottens betraktelser"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Det verkar som om du simtr\u00e4nar. Vill du registrera ett tr\u00e4ningspass? <\/em>Jag stod vid \u00e5tervinningen vid Edberga och sl\u00e4ngde tomma mj\u00f6lkpaket mitt i vintern n\u00e4r den h\u00e4r fr\u00e5gan kom fr\u00e5n min \u201dsmarta\u201d klocka. Simtr\u00e4nar? \u00c4r den smarta klockan helt vrickad?<\/em> Hann jag t\u00e4nka, innan jag ins\u00e5g att armens r\u00f6relser f\u00f6rst\u00e5s p\u00e5minde om crawl.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag fick min smarta klocka av min syster f\u00f6r ett par \u00e5r sedan. Vilken suver\u00e4n grej! Den hade ju b\u00e4ttre koll p\u00e5 mig \u00e4n jag hade sj\u00e4lv! Den kontrollerade att jag f\u00e5tt upp pulsen minst 30 minuter per dag. Satt jag still p\u00e5 kontoret mer \u00e4n 50 minuter i str\u00e4ck sa den till mig att resa mig och g\u00e5 ett varv. Den k\u00e4nde av om jag tog en l\u00f6ptur. Wow. Sedan b\u00f6rjade det n\u00e4stan bli lite creepy. N\u00e4r jag satt i en f\u00f6rhandling en g\u00e5ng kom ett meddelande fr\u00e5n klockan: ANDAS!<\/em> Liksom, what the fuck?Min systers klocka, som har en extra antistressmodul, blev pl\u00f6tsligt ekivok och f\u00f6reslog skaml\u00f6st att hon borde \u201duppleva en orgasm\u201d. Jor\u00e5s\u00e5atte.<\/p>

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Under jullovet blev min klocka st\u00f6ddig emot mig. Den tyckte att jag motionerade f\u00f6r lite. (Det kan eventuellt ha varit s\u00e5 att jag gjorde det.) Den b\u00f6rjade spydigt p\u00e5minna mig om att jag borde ta en rask promenad f\u00f6r att st\u00e4nga mina ringar<\/em>. Det \u00e4r s\u00e5 det heter p\u00e5 smartklockespr\u00e5k. St\u00e4nga sina ringar.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dJag ska bara springa n\u00e5gra varv runt huset s\u00e5 att jag st\u00e4nger mina ringar!\u201d <\/em>\u00e4r numera en helt normal sak att utbrista. Vanliga veckor \u00e4r det ju l\u00e4tt, man tar bara en liten l\u00f6ptur p\u00e5 lunchrasten s\u00e5 \u00e4r det kirrat. Men n\u00e4r man sitter d\u00e4r p\u00e5 jullovskv\u00e4llen ikl\u00e4dd pyjamas, framf\u00f6r den mysiga filmen, med ett goluktande barn i kn\u00e4t, s\u00e5 har ju inte klockan mycket f\u00f6r att den anv\u00e4nder en insinuant ton. L\u00f6pturen uteblir. Jag brukar skylla p\u00e5 att det \u00e4r f\u00f6r m\u00f6rkt och halt h\u00e4rute p\u00e5 landet. Jag vet mycket v\u00e4l att jag har fyra pannlampor, sju reflexv\u00e4star, en l\u00f6pningsv\u00e4st med blinkande LED-ljus och tv\u00e5 par dubbade l\u00f6parskor i hallen. Men n\u00e4r man snickrar ihop undanflykter till sig sj\u00e4lv s\u00e5 \u00e4r det inte alls sv\u00e5rt att \u201dgl\u00f6mma bort\u201d detta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men klockj\u00e4veln ger sig ju inte. Ringarna ska st\u00e4ngas. Pulsen ska g\u00e5 upp. Bara 7 minuter till s\u00e5 \u00e4r det klart sedan!<\/em> blinkar det p\u00e5 armen. Jamen f\u00f6r helvete! Mitt i filmen st\u00e4ller jag mig s\u00e5ledes helt sonika upp och b\u00f6rjar dansa. Ja, ni l\u00e4ste r\u00e4tt. Jag dansade. Jag g\u00f6r verkligen inte anspr\u00e5k p\u00e5 att dansa s\u00e4rskilt snyggt. Jag \u00e4r ingen Jennifer Lopez precis. Men jag tycker \u00e4nd\u00e5 att det jag gjorde f\u00f6ll under kategorin dans<\/em>. Det tyckte uppenbarligen inte 7-\u00e5ringen:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dVad g\u00f6r du s\u00e5 d\u00e4r f\u00f6r mamma? \u00c4r du kissn\u00f6dig?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure>
\n

Lotten Alveling<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tedrickande v\u00e4nsterh\u00e4nt V\u00e4stervikiskt Westlife-fan. Yngst av fyra syskon. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tar vara p\u00e5 livet med barnen Karin & Gustav. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sjunger, skriver, l\u00f6ptr\u00e4nar, l\u00e4ser b\u00f6cker, ser p\u00e5 film, spelar fl\u00f6jt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bor i \u00d6nhult. F\u00f6dd 1977. Gift.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n
\"\"<\/a><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Det verkar som om du simtr\u00e4nar. Vill du registrera ett tr\u00e4ningspass? Jag stod vid \u00e5tervinningen vid Edberga och sl\u00e4ngde tomma mj\u00f6lkpaket mitt i vintern n\u00e4r den h\u00e4r fr\u00e5gan kom fr\u00e5n min \u201dsmarta\u201d klocka. Simtr\u00e4nar? \u00c4r den smarta klockan helt vrickad? Hann jag t\u00e4nka, innan jag ins\u00e5g att armens r\u00f6relser f\u00f6rst\u00e5s p\u00e5minde om crawl. Jag fick […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":7092,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":true,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5262,763],"tags":[754,752,801],"class_list":["post-7090","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-atvidaberg-artiklar","category-atvidabergsplatsen","tag-atvidaberg","tag-atvidabergsplatsen","tag-kronika"],"yoast_head":"\nLottens betraktelser - MediaTrio AB | Tidningar | Fokus p\u00e5 det lokala livet<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sv_SE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Lottens betraktelser\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Det verkar som om du simtr\u00e4nar. 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